sometimes transition is not easy for me

in birthing or in life

i can feel lost overwhelmed and unsure I can accomplish the task at hand

can i meet what is coming towards me

the immensity of change

in a breath i am very casual about it all

and sometimes it seems i will breeze through it cheerfully and singing

{this time i will apply all precious knowledge and it will be cake}

and in the next breath i am swamped

by emotions anxiety confusion fear

and helplessness may pop up to join the tea party

this lifestyle i embrace and choose wholeheartedly

has one major difficulty

which is presently with me

transition

finding my centre amidst the change of circumstance.

we are having a pause of some months from being on the road

and i am excited to nest and craft and garden and socialise and sing

and be part of our community

but

first i have to get back from my trip west

and then reintergrate family as we reunite with papa after a month apart

and then arrive in Bellingen

and get used to being parked up in the gloriousness of our friends property

and get into the rhythm of school and lunchboxes and bus stops

and get myself reintergrated and adapted to this next chapter

i think i am contracting inwards

and it hurts abit

i feel better when i go for a walk or a swim in the pristine clear Bellinger river

or when i load up the wheelbarrow and do numerous loads of shifting garden debris

or when i am held in my loves embrace

in moments i think i am really here

and then poof

i am not

this transition takes time

one week is not enough to get my head around it

and rediscover who i am and how i interact here now

i feel more ungrounded this moment than when i am actually in motion traveling

somewhere inside i trust i will come in and feel at ease

and centered and present again

somewhere i know the reality of jetlag

and climate shift

and daylight savings

and external influences

and somewhere i know its moving house again

we all know how incredibly trying that task is

once i wrote traveling is like mini moving house every day

yep

and i love it

once i had spilled all my tumultuous anxiety about this phase to a friend she asked

why do you do it to yourself?

i said

i love it

i love the adventure

the stimulation

the expansion

the freedom

the nature

the change

the time together

the discoveries

it’s worth it.

 

 

once someone wise taught me a game to play at stressful times where

i imagine myself into the future

i am asking myself

“so Roselinde, how did you cope with that challenging time?”

and often the qualities i need to embrace are revealed to me

“well, i made sure i ate and slept well, i reminded myself it’s a temporary situation, i tried to maintain my humour, going for walks,

i asked for help and kept on deep breathing and i used my flower essences”

 

it is so so pretty here in the valley in spring

the beauty of nature helps

how do you help yourself get through challenging phases?

what helps you transition?

when do you feel centred?